The thing about jumping blindly...

is it's scary and liberating at the same time.

It's about time.

It's about time I create new associations. It's easy to throw out certain things that are associated with certain memories, but we still need this house so I guess it's staying. And I can't blow up Bigoli or Conspiracy either.
It's about time I close this book and make new memories. It's about time I stop figuring out where things went wrong. It's about time that I wont let anyone pull me down whenever I take a step forward. It's about time I accept the fact that some things are not meant to be, and more importantly, that better things are to come.
It's about time I get up and move out from the comfort of this grief.

Gawd, coz this is getting old.

Blanko.

Palayo na ng palayo ang pangalan mo sa who's viewed me page ko. Palabo na rin ng palabo ang alaala ng mukha mo o ng kulot mong buhok sa isip ko. Minsan nalilimutan ko na ang lalim ng iyong boses, o ang pakiramdam ng magising sa hudyat ng missed call mo. Nawawalan na ng kahulugan ang awitin mo para sakin, at nagiging isang nakakairita at nkaka-LSS na overplayed na kanta na lamang. Minsan, nangungulila parin ako para sa isang taong mapagsusumbungan o makukwentuhan; isang taong laging naryan at inaako ang buhay ko bilang buhay na rin nila. Pero alam kong ayoko ng balikan ang natapos na.

So, anong problema ko? Natatakot lang ako. Kahit mahirap, posible rin palang makalimot. Gigising rin pala ako na tila panaginip lang ang lahat. Darating din pala ang araw na tila estranghero ka na lamang. At kapag tuluyan ka ng mabura sa buhay ko at magtapos na ang yugtong ito, ano na? Tila isang blankong papel na lang ang buhay ko na nakatitig sa akin; nayayamot at naiinip para akin itong punan. Nakakalula.